Dear Baby, 36 Week Update

This weekend I experienced a painful low pressure and aching along with the occasional "ouch ouch ouch" moment when anything moved inside me. It hurt and it made me walk like an elephant; swaying from side to side. Graeme had to be on hand to help me stand up and to lower me back down. This pain is still continuing now, but the ouchie moments are less frequent and come and go. It feels like she is trying to push herself out of my nether regions. 

At our antenatal class on Sunday our instructor joked with a twinkle in her eye that I had "dropped" and would probably be giving birth this week. Hilarious. 

I saw my midwife yesterday during our weekly appointments and described the discomfort and pain to her. She said that most likely the baby was engaging into my pelvis. She felt where the baby was laying (bum sticking out the the right side with its spine curved near my belly button) and said she couldn't feel the head. This either means she's fully engaged or not at all, apparently. (or our baby has suddenly lost her head (kind of like me this week)).

Not at all = exactly where I was last week, no biggie. But then what is this pain coming from??

Fully engaged = The baby is in position to be birthed. Waters may break easier as there is more pressure on them, but the baby could stay there for weeks and weeks. If she is in this position she is unlikely to get out of it because of my tight stomach muscles (yeyah)

My midwife did not seem to be concerned or troubled at all by this development (So I'm thinking our baby still has her head intact...) and said that she would try and locate her again next week. 

So, here I am in bed, the only place I seem to be able to have some relief from the pains, even though they kept waking me up during the night. Argh.

The trouble is, when people share what they are thinking you start to think them too. Before this weekend I was quite happy to wait another 4-6 ish weeks for our baby to come. I was content and feeling big but good. Now that the idea has been placed in my head that I might have a fully engaged baby I can't get it out! It's all I can think about. Every time I go to the bathroom I'm checking for some sort of labour sign. I know, I know, its really silly. I'm so annoyed at myself for letting these thoughts creep in early.

For those who might be confused, I am definitely NOT in labour right now. Just to clear that up.

What I am is frustrated. These pains could last another month or so. That would be super sucky. I really really really hope they dont. Either they go away, or this baby comes early. 

Any advice?

Mostly, this has just been a rant to vent my frustrations. I know there is no known answer to this. I am going to try and convince myself of that fact today.

Here I am in all my 36 week glory. 

We had Jelly Babies on the ride home from Tai Tapu. Looking down onto my belly, this Baby was in the same position that MiniMoo is in! Yum Yum.

Dearest Baby Girl,

This week you are either ready to be birthed, aren't ready at all, or you've lost your head. Suddenly, I'm hoping for the first option. I woke up in the middle of the night last week with the hugest urge to get clothes out ready for your arrival. I have the cutest warmest outfit picked out ready for your first day in this world. 

See you soon little one.

Ma x

P.s - Have you entered my giveaway yet? Guess the Moos birthdate and win a print from Half Full Designs! :) Click here for deets (This post may or may not change your guess on the date! ;))